As promised, here is the video of me reading at the first-ever Chuck Palahniuk’s Midwest Story Night in Youngstown, Ohio!! And for those of you who would like to read along, below is the text… Without further ado, here is SPLIT LIP.
The recurring seafood/lobster dinner and “burning the meat off your curtains”. Excellent imagery, and the transitioning of the seafood was well executed.
"You look up at Mr. Right and his mouth is an O and his eyes are Daffy Duck with egg yolks dripping into the whites, and when you reach down to press four firm fingers on your freshly de-furred burger, he grabs the inside of your wrist and says, Don’t."
I figured I'd scan the first few lines on the email version and wait to read the full story later ... here I am, approximately 2:30 minutes after my email notification popped up. Story read.
Do I laugh? Do I scream? I do both. That was simultaneously horrifying and hilarious.
Gonna have to give it another listen later when can be more focused, cos I really don't wanna miss a single sentence, and I'm in an empty classroom at work it's not optimal conditions. Love the accent and the voice. Just the kind of American I can get on board with!
Any chance you could post the story in written format too? (Or send it to me?) Please. I'm much more of a reader than a listener, if I want to really appreciate the words and thought that's gone into structure. Don't worry if not, I'll understand.
Well done, friend! Really pleased for you, you absolutely smashed it to bits!
Thanks so much Kris!! Yeah, classroom is probably not the place for this one haha!! You should find the text in this post, directly below the video. Look again and let me know if it's not showing up. I'm the same way-- Much better at Reading>Listening. Thank you thank you!!
I've never watched a star get born before........but there you are!!!!! Thank you for everything! You are clearly the best part of "Write Club" and now here we go, our votes for each other canceling each other's out! Good luck!
I did not think I would understand what the MC was doing to herself, and I was also not sure I wanted to know, but this was amazing. My only disappointment is that I won't get to read Chuck's thoughts on it...I'm actually writing a scene now with, I'm assuming, similar motivations (PG-13, though ;-)), and it's exciting and inspiring to see how you've done what I'm trying to do. Bravo for that! What we'll all do for love, right?
And oh yeah: "(which you have so smartly set out ahead of time so you do not find yourself fumbling with the package, frantically trying to free a unit of cloth before the smeared goop cools into a tearing-the-meat-off-your-curtain state.)" was my favorite-apparently she's done this already and made a terrible mistake by not setting out these muslin strips beforehand...
Thank you, Amran...this is gonna break your heart but, I actually sold all my football tickets during college. Every year, every game except one. The Notre Dame/Michigan game. Growing up near South Bend, my folks were ND fans, and I well...I rooted for ND in the big house. Not that I actually care about football. 😆😆 I almost regret putting it in my bio. But it’s my only achievement!! And truly it was barely. But that’s a story for a different day. Thanks for reading! Please don’t unfriend me after reading this. 😁😁
A degree from Michigan is a great accomplishment however you cross the finish line -- even for a ND fan. :-)
I missed many games working Saturdays myself and don't take the institution too seriously. It's a morally repugnant enterprise but it keeps me bonded to my closest friends.
Knowing you're a ND fan, however, I will redouble my efforts to make them look bad.
Okay, watched the video and read the text. Your story obviously kicks ass.
The first line is so effing good it creates its own unique problem -- you don't even realize how good it is until you re-read it. After I listened to your narration, I read the text. Only then does it hit you how pitch perfect it is. Bravo.
The sawzall line slays.
Now, the only -- only -- thing I might suggest to add to this piece is this: because the nurses give nicknames and gossip about the ridiculous injuries, and because the sawzall dildo is alluded to, I think there's an opportunity to riff on that idea one more time in the narration. Just a quick line that drives home the idea that embarrassing, ridiculous, self-inflicted injuries become legendary.
It's not a must have, but I think it might tie the first and last lines of the story together that much better.
Thank you very much, Amran. Here's a little insider info for you. The sawzall line, I wasn't sure if I was going to keep it or not. I kept going back and forth for reasons which I won't get into, but, I finally ended with the thought that the whole point of Story Night is to test drive it. And to just see what the audience would do. Long story short--IT STAYS!!! :) :) :) For sure will consider your suggestions. Thanks again.
Absolutely FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC!!! Hilariously disturbing story and excellent delivery! I love your use of tantalizing sexually descriptive words and euphemisms that keep the audience engaged and turned on by the whole scenery of a girl spreading herself wide and waxing her va-jay-jay and then the whole twist of the knife when it all turns to bloody yucky chopped up fish chum and guts. Your stage presence totally rocked too! Totally captivated by you! A++ Can't wait for your next tale!!
Steve, I'm so glad to hear that! When I watch it, I can see my own nervousness took almost halfway through the reading before I finally relaxed, haha! I bet that sort of thing becomes easier with practice. It really was a blast, once I could finally catch my breath. Thank you so much for listening and reading. Very happy to hear that you enjoyed it. :) :)
Thanks Tony!
This was phenomenal! Great story and you read it very well. Good job!
Thank you, Robb! I'm so happy you liked it!! :)
The recurring seafood/lobster dinner and “burning the meat off your curtains”. Excellent imagery, and the transitioning of the seafood was well executed.
Great story
Thanks so much, Craig!!
Thanks for sharing!
"You look up at Mr. Right and his mouth is an O and his eyes are Daffy Duck with egg yolks dripping into the whites, and when you reach down to press four firm fingers on your freshly de-furred burger, he grabs the inside of your wrist and says, Don’t."
I figured I'd scan the first few lines on the email version and wait to read the full story later ... here I am, approximately 2:30 minutes after my email notification popped up. Story read.
Do I laugh? Do I scream? I do both. That was simultaneously horrifying and hilarious.
Oh man, “Do I laugh? Do I scream? I do both. That was simultaneously horrifying and hilarious.”
Exactly what I was hoping for!!!!! 😃😃 Thank you for reading and commenting, Richard! You made my morning.
great reading and story. Please do more.
Thank you very much, Rob!! :)
So good, Maegan! I'm in awe right now.
Gonna have to give it another listen later when can be more focused, cos I really don't wanna miss a single sentence, and I'm in an empty classroom at work it's not optimal conditions. Love the accent and the voice. Just the kind of American I can get on board with!
Any chance you could post the story in written format too? (Or send it to me?) Please. I'm much more of a reader than a listener, if I want to really appreciate the words and thought that's gone into structure. Don't worry if not, I'll understand.
Well done, friend! Really pleased for you, you absolutely smashed it to bits!
Thanks so much Kris!! Yeah, classroom is probably not the place for this one haha!! You should find the text in this post, directly below the video. Look again and let me know if it's not showing up. I'm the same way-- Much better at Reading>Listening. Thank you thank you!!
I am the definition of ADHD! 🤣
Got it!
🤣🤣🤣
Can't get meat curtains out my head now.
Hehehe
(so proud)
Thank you, Karie Anne!!
I've never watched a star get born before........but there you are!!!!! Thank you for everything! You are clearly the best part of "Write Club" and now here we go, our votes for each other canceling each other's out! Good luck!
Aw Karie Anne, now I am blushing ☺️ ☺️🥰 So glad I got to meet you. Write on my friend!!
I'm coming back in March.........hope you are too!
Will try!
I don’t know about star but it sure is nice to have readers like you guys to take the time for me. You all are the best.
I did not think I would understand what the MC was doing to herself, and I was also not sure I wanted to know, but this was amazing. My only disappointment is that I won't get to read Chuck's thoughts on it...I'm actually writing a scene now with, I'm assuming, similar motivations (PG-13, though ;-)), and it's exciting and inspiring to see how you've done what I'm trying to do. Bravo for that! What we'll all do for love, right?
Jack! Thank you so much!! :) Really glad to hear that you enjoyed it. Would love to take a look at your scene-in-progress when you're done!
And oh yeah: "(which you have so smartly set out ahead of time so you do not find yourself fumbling with the package, frantically trying to free a unit of cloth before the smeared goop cools into a tearing-the-meat-off-your-curtain state.)" was my favorite-apparently she's done this already and made a terrible mistake by not setting out these muslin strips beforehand...
Bingo--this is what I was trying for! :)
Maegan -- I've been really jammed up and want to give your story proper attention. Thoughts soon!
And, BTW, Go Blue!
Thank you, Amran...this is gonna break your heart but, I actually sold all my football tickets during college. Every year, every game except one. The Notre Dame/Michigan game. Growing up near South Bend, my folks were ND fans, and I well...I rooted for ND in the big house. Not that I actually care about football. 😆😆 I almost regret putting it in my bio. But it’s my only achievement!! And truly it was barely. But that’s a story for a different day. Thanks for reading! Please don’t unfriend me after reading this. 😁😁
Never!
A degree from Michigan is a great accomplishment however you cross the finish line -- even for a ND fan. :-)
I missed many games working Saturdays myself and don't take the institution too seriously. It's a morally repugnant enterprise but it keeps me bonded to my closest friends.
Knowing you're a ND fan, however, I will redouble my efforts to make them look bad.
❤️❤️❤️
Okay, watched the video and read the text. Your story obviously kicks ass.
The first line is so effing good it creates its own unique problem -- you don't even realize how good it is until you re-read it. After I listened to your narration, I read the text. Only then does it hit you how pitch perfect it is. Bravo.
The sawzall line slays.
Now, the only -- only -- thing I might suggest to add to this piece is this: because the nurses give nicknames and gossip about the ridiculous injuries, and because the sawzall dildo is alluded to, I think there's an opportunity to riff on that idea one more time in the narration. Just a quick line that drives home the idea that embarrassing, ridiculous, self-inflicted injuries become legendary.
It's not a must have, but I think it might tie the first and last lines of the story together that much better.
Superb stuff. Per usual. Well done.
Thank you very much, Amran. Here's a little insider info for you. The sawzall line, I wasn't sure if I was going to keep it or not. I kept going back and forth for reasons which I won't get into, but, I finally ended with the thought that the whole point of Story Night is to test drive it. And to just see what the audience would do. Long story short--IT STAYS!!! :) :) :) For sure will consider your suggestions. Thanks again.
Finally got a chance to listen, so good!
My wife is a hairdresser and when I heard “Sally’s beauty supply store” I audibly when...”oh no.”
The entire thing is gripping and just plain fun to listen to/read.
Thank you, Matt!! Very happy you enjoyed it. And that you felt the doom early on!! 😄😄
Absolutely FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC!!! Hilariously disturbing story and excellent delivery! I love your use of tantalizing sexually descriptive words and euphemisms that keep the audience engaged and turned on by the whole scenery of a girl spreading herself wide and waxing her va-jay-jay and then the whole twist of the knife when it all turns to bloody yucky chopped up fish chum and guts. Your stage presence totally rocked too! Totally captivated by you! A++ Can't wait for your next tale!!
I’m so happy you liked it, Dude!!! Thank you very very much for taking the time!! 😁 You readers are what it’s all about.
This is such a great story to listen to! Awesome work, Maegan! You keep the reader so present.
Steve, I'm so glad to hear that! When I watch it, I can see my own nervousness took almost halfway through the reading before I finally relaxed, haha! I bet that sort of thing becomes easier with practice. It really was a blast, once I could finally catch my breath. Thank you so much for listening and reading. Very happy to hear that you enjoyed it. :) :)
Read this aloud to my mister right just now, cry laughed the second time reading this today 😂😂😭 way to make true horror have humor 👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼🫶🫶🫶
Thank you Grace, I’m so glad you enjoyed. 🥩❤️